actual dialogue from the game
“I’m not chaotic good. I’m chaotic GREAT!!”
Our half-orc sorcerer
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*on a date*
babe….when im with you……shrimp heaven really *is* now……
the bartender who has seen you use this line on at least 5 different dates: you can’t keep doing this daniel
Oh noooooooo! The mystery is solved! You’ve solved my final riddle, you are ze new riddle master... Congratulations… You have proven yourselves... quite the adventurers... oh, I’ve landed on Bryan- Bryan, ahhh… Bryan, I’m so proud of zem… I’m going to die now... My life is flagging from my body... I’ll see my family... goodbye cruel worrrrld-
I literally have no context for this and it’s fucking me up.
So I just came out to my Mormon grandma. I expected a lot of things! I had a lot of fears! Prepared for many eventualities!
I was NOT prepared for her to say, “Oh honey, I already knew. The Holy Ghost told me.”
d&d ask meme →
[[ inbox either the emoji or race name to ask one or more of the following ]]
✨ aasimar: What do you find to be your most unique characteristic?
🔮 changeling: Share a childhood memory.
🐉 dragonborn: Give at least (one) unpopular opinion on something.
🗻 dwarf: Talk about a skill you either know or would like to learn!
🌳 elf: What do you like to rest and relax?
🍃 firbolg: Is there something you would die to protect?
🔥 genasi: Share a memory in which you felt truly empowered.
🦎 gith: Have you ever lost a relationship over a conflicting belief?
⚙️ gnome: What is your favorite piece of art, music or literature?
🔪 goblin: Have you ever lashed out to protect yourself?
⚔️ goliath: Talk about the most dangerous experience you’ve ever had.
🌕 half-elf: Where would you build your dream home?
🌻 halfling: Talk about a time you indulged your curiosity.
🔰 half-orc: Do people find you intimidating?
💁🏿 human: What do you feel is your greatest weakness?
🐤 kenku: How well do you communicate with others?
😈 tiefling: What is the best or worst first impression you’ve ever made?
🔱 triton: What is your relationship like with water or the sea?
🐍 yuan-ti: Would you say you’re cold or warm-blooded?
The single funniest thing I’ve seen in 2019 (sound on)
This is so funny? Why does it only have 500 notes I’m screaming I feel this Italian in my soul